Deadlines: Crush or Be Crushed

Deadlines. Booo!

Talk to any wedded couple, and they’ll tell you that it’s important to make progress on wedding planning decisions. Time is of the essence, of course, and the last thing anyone wants is a bride scrambling to tie up loose ends on her big day.

Unfortunately, after what I would consider a pretty great start in hunting down the perfect reception location, we’ve lost some steam. I can’t tell you the cause, only because I don’t know it. So far we’ve found two reception halls we really like, but since then, it seems we’ve been a bit lax. It’s surprising, too. In May, picking a reception hall by the end of July seemed like an easy task.

Today is August 7. Apparently, not so easy.

Of course, I’m speaking in generalities, as a guy is wont to do. Specifically, I don’t have the slightest game plan figured out for what it is we need to do, and when we need to do it by. I’m sure there are a few glossy wedding magazines that share such juicy tidbits, but I’ve been of the disposition that once the big domino (the reception hall) falls, we’ll be able to knock over the others (invitations, flowers, music) in quick succession. Call it wishful thinking, but I honestly believe we’ll catch a second wind once the stress of locking in a great reception locale has passed.

And believe me – I’m game for hitting the deadlines. Conventional “best-bro” advice says to take a back seat in planning and let the little lady handle it just the way she wants. I won’t be hijacking the search for a dress or anything, but I’m definitely happy – and excited – to help (in other areas, of course) with planning and keeping on track.

Wow, did I just say that?

~ Groom

I consider myself a well-seasoned meet-that-deadline veteran. I’ve taken on the brunt of them with minimal groans and eyelid spasms. But now I have one that I’ve set, one that is not for a job, a class, a long-dreamed-of goal, or freelance work, and I tell you, it’s a whole different ballgame. First of all, this deadline feels soft and pliable. I can push it off to the side and it still looks as pretty and simple as the flowers I have to order to meet it. I’ve started wondering if I should be reading more into my lackluster drive to pummel this deadline into the ground. It’s not that I don’t want to plan a wedding, I do. It’s not that I don’t want to marry the man I live with – I want that more than anything. It’s just, at the end of the day, when I’ve met work deadlines, studied for the GRE and stuck to my daily commitment to write fiction, I find that I’m tired and that couch just looks so wonderful! Planning a wedding is something I can only seem to be excited about on the weekend, usually Sunday morning, when I can be in frame of mind to flip have-to’s to want-to’s. I recently discovered a term called the anti-bride; they want to get married but don’t want to have a wedding. I thought I might be falling into that but after I thought about it, I realized I really do want to have a wedding and a marriage. I just want to sleep and write too. What do you think? Is it possible to have a life and plan a wedding? If so, how? If you know, tell me!!! I could use the help.

~ Bride

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